Love and tenderness

Love is tender, because it always gives priority to the feeling of mate. So it wants his comfort more than own comfort.

Love is made of tender feelings like forgiveness, tenderness, trust, softness. Real love is always willing to forgive, trust. Till the day that trust is shattered to pieces, but that day love also leaves. Or else it rises above any expectations and touches divine. It lets go even the least expectation from the mate. His betrayal, untrustworthiness no longer matter to her. She loves him just the way he is. But such love is not that common.

Love that is not tender and trusting is usually not love, something swinging very close to it but not touching it. It either touches it and becomes complete or dries away with time.

No real lover will treat his mate harshly or unkindly, with anger or venom, mistrust or unkindness. When these symptoms start to crop up in some relationship that means love is slipping away from it.

People often cling to such relationships to cause themselves greater pain in future.

Love and acceptance

When we truly love someone we accept him or her. With his whole being. Don’t try to change him unless its something harmful for him. Even then, the reason for changing is his welfare not our own sake.

I personally think that we can’t change anyone. I have seen too many lovers bitterly accusing each other just because they failed to change the other, or because they are too demanding.

Every human being has a right to be himself or herself. Love means accepting this simple truth. That our lover is not a doll handed out to us, a doll we can dress up the way we want. In that case he will have to be lifeless. Every living being has his own will and ways and he will act as per them. By not accepting we will only cause miseries.

Love and mutual respect

Love never wants its own authority. Its own way or submission of its loved one. Love knows how to respect the identity and freedom of its mate, loved one.

Love can never survive without mutual respect. If both the mates don’t respect each other that relationship won’t last. No matter how deep the passion or love is it will ebb away unless they learn to respect and trust each other.

Mutual respect is foundation of every fruitful relationship. No one can deny this truth.

Before loving a person one should better check if he can respect and trust that person. If he can do these two then love will automatically follow and the relationship will stay. But if there is only love then it will fill up the hearts for a while then slowly ebb away.

Love and religion

Love knows no chain. True love rises above every obstacle. It’s a bond of hearts and souls. And when two heart and soul are bond together they can overcome any obstacle.

 

But before starting such a journey one should first search one’s soul. Because difference of belief, faith is the greatest reason behind enmity of men. So we should think really well how much we will be able to respect the faith of our loved one, even if it is exactly opposite to ours. Or if their faith makes them do something which is disgusting in our eyes. Say for example, cow is a very holy animal in Hinduism but most of the other religions allow eating them. No orthodox Hindu will eat cow or eat in a utensil which has cooked cow. Well, this is the only example cropped in my mind.

 

Though I am not a very orthodox person but I wont eat cow and wont feel really comfortable to eat from a pot which has not been washed after being used to keep beef.

 

A belief with which we are born is next to impossible to shake off. But if two people love each other they can adjust. I have heard Muslim girls giving up beef or even non veg after marrying vegetarian families or muslim men not eating beef at home after marrying hindu girls. The main point is respect for each other’s faith I believe. In case of religion that faith has to be really firm.

 

They will have to think what they will do if all of a sudden their people of their religions start to riot with each other.

Love and passion

Passion, romanticism, possessiveness, jealousy…. These all are essential ingredients of a fully bloomed love. Of course human love. There are few people who rise above all these feelings and can love selflessly, I believe in their existence but am yet to meet one. I am quite human, so I will talk about the mortal love not angelic love.

 

These feelings in a controlled and mild dose make love really spicy but if we let them grow they can ruin the love.

 

They are just like grass in a garden, I wont like a garden which has no patch of grass in it. Actually I like gardens which are a mix of natural and human actions. A little touch of nature to feel her grandeur but not too much, because that will choke the delicate plants.

 

Just like that, a little jealousy, a little possessiveness now and then adds the rustic charm to the divine feeling of love. It makes it a little unpredictable, a little fun. But it should never outgrow love itself.

 

Love should be the final say of the relationship.

Love and adjustment

This is the trap where a lot of beautiful relationships fall and die. We think that mutual consent is the end of the struggles of a relationship. Hard days are over, now they live happily ever after. In reality its just the other way round. It is the beginning of adjustments.

 

Two different personalities start to adjust with each other on a day to day basis, or may be on a round the clock basis. They have to adjust to every thing of the other one.

 

If we look at our parents or the earlier generations we will realize that adjustment is not that tough. If both of them try then it can work like magic.  We have to think about the compatibility before starting a relationship, not after going half way through it. Of course if we are the committed type. Non committal persons can walk out of any relationship at any time.

 

If we forget the truth that a relationship is fifty percent love and fifty percent adjustment then we will be soon flying in air without any support underneath.

 

This is one of the main reasons that very passionate relationships often end up in constant frictions. We fool ourselves by not thinking about changing ourselves at all or dreaming that we will change our mate as per our wishes and comfort.

 

Adjustment is the price we pay for true love. The stronger the love is the greater is the desire and determination of adjustment

Expressing love

You know which songs I hate most? The old Hindi movie songs which advocated that true love does not uses tongue or actions to express itself.

 

Come on! How will the other one understand it then? By magic or by thought-reading?

 

I personally believe and will always believe that if you love someone you should always let that person know clearly that you love that person and always will. Of course if you don’t want to lose him. Or else you may hide that feeling and see him walk away forever, thinking he does not means any thing to you.

 

I personally believe that unless the chances of meeting are impossible, any sincere person should express his feelings, and any sincere woman should give clear hints of her feelings to her lover and in case of others she too will act just like a man, express herself. In case of love I can certainly understand feminine shyness.

 

By mentioning the term “chances of meeting are impossible” I wanted to say some relationships just don’t or can’t work out, so its better to hide them, instead of expressing them and acting like a fool.

 

When I was a young girl I used to commute in school bus, there was a senior girl in the bus who had a huge crush on Ravi Shastri; she even used to dream of her. That innocent girl used to share her dreams with everyone who used to laugh at her behind her back. Well, she was a student of school so in her case it was obviously childish but we adults also sometimes fall in love with stars, in those cases I would suggest to not express them. Otherwise, one should express one’s feelings as long as its respectable and respected.

Happily childless

I dote after children. Have doted after them since my early childhood because they have brought only happiness in my life. I have once brought up a spitz puppy from one month to the day she died, eleven years later.

 

She brought out the maternal instinct in me and I realized how precious that feeling is, and I realized how precious children are to their parents.

 

Well, very frankly speaking I think I am too independent minded and self respecting to marry as per Indian traditional way and too shy to look for a husband myself so I stayed happily unattached.

 

There was a time, till my mid thirties I guess when I used to pine a little for a child of my own. My own born. Then when I notice the horrible speed at which the atrocity against children is shooting upwards I feel happy that I did not bring a child in this violent world which does not love its offspring. I know very well that I would have doted after him or her too much.

 

Since last five years or so I have thanked God quite a lot that she did not listened to my requests. If I ever long for a child I would rather attach myself to an orphanage.

Beautiful gestures

When I was a child I have been taught by my parents that we should say thank you to everyone who does some thing good to us, and sorry when we do something bad to someone.

 

The same thing has been taught in schools I have learnt. I have personally added a few things to it, I think we all can practice it with the touch of heart, or else it will become a façade.

 

One, I always find out a quality in a person who compliments me, and if not then, later pay him or her a compliment. Actually I like paying compliments voluntarily, and finding out qualities in people. I think by paying a person a compliment I spread a little harmless happiness. That’s a thing worth spreading to me.

 

Two, if someone helps me, I certainly try to help him back. Let it be paying a compliment on my cooking skill, writing skill or something else. I either help him back in the same manner or some other. One of my blogger friends taught me two invaluable things, that moment I promised myself that I will support him in his ventures, but truthfully. I don’t pay false compliments on serious issues, or don’t give false boost. I always say the truth when it comes to serious things, but often pay false compliments on looks, or cooking etc.

 

For today, just these two. May be I will share a little more in future. I believe if we cherish manners, beautiful gestures, coursey, thankfulness and grace it will make us even more attractive to those who will come in touch with us.

be responsible

People often say that the things which happen to us are results of our own actions, in this life or past life.

 

I don’t believe in this, because I have seen evil flourish and virtue perish more than a thousand times. But I believe that when we take the responsibility and consequences of our willing actions with dignity and strength we prove that we are matured.

 

If we have that strength in ourselves two benefits can be reaped from that, one, we will think ten times before doing any thing which may cause negative impact. Two, we will go to sleep with a peaceful mind, we will know that we committed a mistake and we paid the price. We bore the punishment with dignity, we did not cried or complained or attempted to blame some one else for our own fault. I think it’s a very big victory upon our own weakness, the tendency of disowning our own mistakes.

 

So my earnest prayer to God is to give me the mental strength to be  fully responsible for my own, willing actions and accept their consequences, by heart, soul and mind.

A thief’s heart

I have read it in too many books and too many stories that I started to test its authenticity from quite an early childhood.

It did not took me long to realize its authenticity. A thief’s heart is rarely at rest. It is always afraid, partly because it is scared that the true owner will claim and win the stolen property and partly because he knows that it can be stolen from him too. Its not very tough to steal, any one can do it. People don’t steal because they don’t want to, or their conscience does not allow them do it. Not because they are incapable of doing it. So his heart is always afraid.

Then comes the prick of conscience and the fear of punishment. Greed for more adds up with all these. At the end if we see the stealing takes its price with interest.

Nothing is more peaceful and happy than an easy conscience. Its pockets may be empty but its heart and soul is full, brimming.

appreciating own company

People often get scared by this thought, spending time with oneself. But if we think thoroughly, is there any person in this world who is absolutely out of human touch? Unless he lives in some god forbidden place.

 

We always have so many things around us which keep us directly or indirectly connected to others..phone, television, radio, internet, books, movies….

 

I am not asking anyone to confine himself or herself to rooms and live a lonely life against will. My opinion is in today’s busy world if we are forced a life where we don’t have much company or no company at all then enjoy that solitude.

 

People of younger age are more vulnerable to this feeling, I too have been once. I lived away for a year in a state where nothing was common to west bengal, and only handcounted relatives. So I used to spend my free time roaming around the roads in my sunny or licking the brain of a tenant of the same house.

 

But slowly I made a habit of staying alone, I saw people will raise their eyebrow in both cases and pass remarks, but in the second condition, that is my present way of life, I will have full control on my time, my life and I will never feel like a fool when I will look back at it.

 

I utilize my time with myself by  listening to music, writing, reading or working. There are too many productive hobbies we can take up. But I always take up a hobby to enjoy, not to toil on. They always leave me refreshed, looking forward to do it again. We should always select hobbies which wil leave us a better person, and enhance our capacity as a human being.

A little promise to myself

In this world of pain and betrayal not to lose my heart and spirit if my expression of love, respect and trust is misinterpreted

 

Instead of getting hurt making my heart and soul strong enough to radiate these feelings irrespective of the responses.

 

People get so much hurt because of their innocent nature that they flinch at every hand stretched at them.

 

I promise myself to be nonchalant toward their reaction as much as I can, and keep my heart and soul full of affection, respect and love for as many fellow human beings as possible.

 

We can never know why a person bites the hand that feeds him, may be someone has misused his gratitude in the past one too many times. Or may be his past is so dark that he cant see light in human beings. I should try not to judge his actions, in place of that I should let his rudeness trickle down my soul like a drop of water trickles down the leaf to grass, without leaving behind a scar.

 

In place of expecting rewards from human beings I should hope that God, who sees it all, blesses me with more chances of serving his children happily.

Cherished

Feeling of being cherished… this is what most of the average human beings look forward to. Just look inside your soul, you will notice this truth.

 

We fall in love to be cherished by a person we admire, we make a friend because we cherish his company and hope that he does the same.

 

Even though my friends often contradict on this point with me, they often say that love, affection should be unselfish. One should not expect any thing from a friend etc etc. I don’t know whether they can really follow these in real life or they just say it to make themselves look good I have completely failed in judging the truth in their point of view, because I have often observed that these people demand the maximum amount of obedience from their mates. Not only that, I have seen that only noncommittal people say these things. So, their words and actions conflict. I personally believe that people who are committed will always expect or hope for commitment from their object of affection or love. As they are giving out their best why shall they compromise for some thing less?

 

They don’t have any confusion about their intention, they know it very well and clear that they will love and cherish their partner till the end, if every thing moves the way it is moving now, so, why shall they not expect the very same in return?

 

Even if we observe animals we will see when they are together, if one of them licks the other, or preens the other the second one too starts doing the same, if not the first one nudges its mate, and if it is unresponsive he also stops. That means it’s a basic instinct to expect love in return of love. There is nothing to feel guilty in it.

 

I have once read a poem, I have forgotten the name of the poet but that poem left an everlasting impact on  my mind, it said some thing like … if you love me don’t be silent, tell me now, because there will be enough silence once I am in my grave… I too believe that, we are blessed with only one life, hence why not spend it sharing affection and warmth? Giving love and having it in return. If the object of our affection does not feels affectionate towards us why shall we not move on and look for some one who will feel affectionate towards us? This is one question I have always pondered on, and have decided after becoming worldly wise that we should move on. Because to get love one must love. Its better to share love than waste one’s life with an unloving, uncaring person and regret later.

humanity and gratitude

Six: Gratitude, humanity and other virtues

These things were taught to us from our parents, schools, and the immense treasure of books and songs that I came in contact through out my growing age and later years.

We have been brought up in a very humble manner, a lot of money was spent on our mental and spiritual development but in case of physical luxuries only the necessary spending was done.

From very childhood when we used to complain for things which others have our parents used to ask her to take a peek in the homes of the gangmans and see the hardships their children face. Hence from very childhood we learnt to concentrate on our privilleges, not our drawbacks. We learnt that hunger is a never ending cycle. Blessed are those who relish whatever is on their plate. Every time I feel a little bored with what is in my plate, that is my life, I feel about those who are deprived from even that. It does not makes me arrogant, it makes me humble, thankful to God. I feel blessed for every thing which I have, and the content from that.

We were taught to always share with others, to help those who are weak in study or other things. Later I gathered one big truth, if we share with others, they may not give us the return personally, or may not be grateful but someone else takes the count and returns. I still remember my college days, I was juggling too many things together, yet I studied as much as I could and I always shared my notes with my close friends, without least hesitation. We all studied with the same notes, I don’t know whether they read mine or not, but I gave it to them any way, but when the results came out I was extremely happy with mine. I secured fourth place among more than 250 students of morning section with a big, non scoring subject like economics. I some how deeply believe that if we help others without any expectation God rewards us, because we don’t even expect her rewards. But she rewards any way.

Truthfulness is another thing which has helped me throughout my life, we have been taught from the very childhood to practice it, even though I was too timid to practice it in my childhood, I used to lie my heads off, but after I grew up, I slowly took the side of truth and stayed with it. But I have a policy, which I don’t regret, I strongly believe that only my well wishers deserve a truth from me. People with the most harmful intention are usually the most prying ones, and if we give out our truths to them, they will use it against us at the first chance, so one should be truthful to those who deserve it. To others they can do whatever they want.

Taking consequences of my own action without cursing myself. This is a habit since childhood. I always practice discipline, and when I break that I don’t complain with the consequences. Instead of that I openly admit that I have made a mistake and am paying the price. Whatever the mistake is. I never shove it down the carpet hoping others will not notice, some one or else will sure drag it out by the least visible portion and then I may have to dive for the carpet. So my policy is if I stumble I will tell it. I am a human being, so its but normal that I will stumble. I am not going to kill myself for that. I will just get up and walk again, but wont hide the truth that I fell down so that others may learn the lesson.

There are many other virtues, which we ourselve have to decide, which are best for us. I pointed out only four of them, which mean a lot to me.

Discipline and manners

Five: Discipline and manners

We have been taught these things in an age when we were not even aware of our human existence I presume. Because I have been aware of these two things since my early childhood, but I never heard my parents telling us these things.

We knew that we will have to get out of bed at our own, clean the bed, brush our teeth, pack our school bags and leave for school. Leaving a neat and clean room behind.

When we are at any one else’s home, we will not disturb any thing, wont ask for any thing even if it’s a piece of heaven, wont touch a single thing without permission.

These small manners, and disciplines help us through out our life. I personally very strongly believe that discipline and manners taught from the family builts up the citizen.

We belong to different social standards, and we mix and mingle with people of different standards, so if we are taught from the childhood that we should not touch any thing which is not our, we learn to control greed, and slowly it moves out of our system.

If we practice to speak in a low volume, in a decent manner, we become more compatible to others.

If we learn to take care of our personal hygiene from very childhood it becomes a life long habit. But the parents should be looking over this portion, whether or not the child is doing it properly.

If we learn from the childhood to clean the mess we have created that will be a lesson to be treasured through out our live. That spares us from the habits of shoving dirt under carpet or leaving a messy place.

These small disciplines and manners, if taught from the very childhood become a part of one’s personality. It becomes a lot easier for the child when he grows up and enters the real world. He does not have to undergo drastical changes to fit the real world. Instead of that, he just have to undergo some minor changes to fit in.

Learning discipline and manners does not means one’s childhood is hampered, I can bet with anyone and everyone that the immense liberty and joy which I derived from that liberty is rarely enjoyed by any one. I was as free as a wild bird, after performing my duties, the discipline and manners only enhanced that joy. Because I knew my limits.

This combination of manners and independence made the foundations of a life which is extremely satisfactory and a personality which is ready and eager to face all types of challenge of life.

simple tricks

Three : Simple mechanical fixing etc

I really lament the lack of this knowledge, when I was in my teenage I have often searched for such institutes which provide crash courses on electronics, carpentry, fixing of household gadgets etc in my small town. It came ten years later, but by that time I was fully engrossed in my career.

But that’s not the scenario any more, now even small towns have such facilities, so if children are enrolled in such courses during summer vacations, they make them far more complete as a human being. It enhances their skills, their self confidence and their capacity to handle trivial problems. In today’s world both boys and girls go out of their family home at young age, and sometimes they live in far away cities alone, so, they have to play the role of both.. the man and woman in their bachelor’s den, these tricks will become too handy for them then.
Not only that, these small skills like a crash course in painting, beautician, doll making, carpentary, electricals, electronics can boost up one’s self satisfaction level to a great limit.

I have always pursued multiple things in life, even though I am not talented but I have tried my hands on writing, painting, singing, guitar etc. Small town environment did not gave me much chance to pursue my fascinations but whatever expertise I gathered I relish it till now. I am a home manager, my hobbies are giving me immense joy and happiness. And I can understand another big truth, that if I had the chance of learning every thing I wanted to learn starting from beautician to doll making, I would have easily earned a hefty pocket money straight from home.

Learning only the materials supplied by school, college and university does not makes a complete human being. We have a life outside our career. To fully develop ourselve as satisfied human beings we should concentrate on our inner self, and try to learn things which will make us more complete and happy.

One should be careful about one thing only, that these hobbies don’t hamper his main career or studies related to that, these should be treated as only hobbies, and he should fix time for these, a fixed time capsule during which he will be doing all of these, and should not cross that time limit. That will teach him putting priority before enjoyment. A big lesson in self control.

That lesson will be proved handy time and time again during his career, when he will have to select between the boring special class after office and date with girl friend.

a must knowledge

TWO : Knowledge against pedophile:

Almost every day these repulsive news are dished out in media, we all read it, but very rare parents take the necessary actions.


This is one thing Indian parents never share with children and as a result these innocents have to go through hell. Our society does not permits us to discuss every thing with our parents and vice versa. Its not that these parents don’t care about the well being of their children, its just that average indian is too shy in these cases. But being shy can be fatal for the children or worse.Children don’t deserve this, so as an adult its our duty to save them from these things. We cant depend on schools, because the teachers don’t have that much intimacy of thoughts with children, they are usually professional beings, out to earn their bread.


I personally believe every mother should make it her duty to well inform her child about these mentally deranged species, who look and act like human beings but are not. Because the way a mother can care for her child, or the mental intimacy she has with them hardly tallies with any one else. They should clearly train their children, to distinguish different types of touches, and how far can any one go before the child complains to you. Every parent should have a friendly relationship with children, which will encourage him or her to share any thing uncomfortable happening with him or her with you. The mental barrier between your children and you should be completely eliminated. They should feel free to discuss with you everything under the sky.


But don’t count on only that, keep a caring eye on his or her behaviour. Because abused children don’t act normally. They are either suffering from immense guilt conscience, rage, pain or fear.


Its not a thing to be taken lightly, if you will read the surveys it will give you shock, that how some people who look like human beings fail to act like them. So with the present state of society and law and order, its our duty to take care of our children. In place of having blind faith on others that they will protect or teach our children, it should be done by us.

Having faith is essence of happy life but having blind faith on others is often the gateway to hell. As the children are your piece of heart, you should be the one who will be taking care of him. Its better to take the step before its too late.

Gardening or keeping a pet

There are a few things which Indian parents often forget to teach the children, and as a result they are either deprived from some great joys or suffer dearly. I have jotted down six of them, and have distributed them in four posts. Even though I don’t and wont have a child of my own, but thought about sharing it with parents:

Four. Gardening or keeping a pet:

Quite contrary to us, who were brought up in a family where only one of the spouses went out for job, most of the children today are brought up in a family where both of their parents are either stuck up in full time jobs, or one of them is stuck up in a full time job and the other is busy playing the role of both.

The children too are too busy in their own life, the journey to and fro the school, the tutions and other activities consume half of the life force and time. In such a hectic and mechanical world, a little garden or a pet can give a child lot of happiness. It will give him the joy of creation, and the sense of responsibility.

But one have to be clear about one thing, if a child keeps a pet he will be the one who will be taking care of him or her, ofcourse under the parent’s supervision. I remember when I was a child my father always used to have a huge garden and a pair of dogs. Those dogs naturally gave birth to puppies, and he used to allow my older siblings to adopt them and take care of them. They were just teenagers then, yet they did it quite expertly. By taking care meant feeding, giving water, brushing, vaccinating every thing. I still remember that both of the dogs which they brought up were quite cute and they even taught them some simple tricks of obedience. Even though its not possible for me to say whether my father supervised.

Apart from pets they each were handed over a piece of land in the garden and asked to plant whatever they wanted in it. My father and mother, both were wonderful gardeners themselves, atleast that’s what I think, never interfered in their small gardens. Only my eldermost brother was my father’s assistant. They used to work on the remaining garden when he was back home from dispensary, or when he was away to the dispensary. One thing should be kept in mind, if a child is going to have a garden he will be tending it, under the guidelines of parents of course.

As I have done both of the things in my childhood and since then, believe me, it helps to grow a lot. If you know that some living thing is dependent on you, your sense of responsibility increases. You just cant flunk this duty, you have to perform it. And when your hard work brings result, the immense happiness which follows can be felt by only those who have done it and received it.

These things bring out the finer side of human nature, love, care, responsibility, dedication and the sense of duty toward other living beings. Which works as a foundation for better life.

a life with golden diva

We all come across them once in a while, or some of us who like me, grow up in shadow of someone like them. The immensely popular persons the golden divas of our famillies. My elder sibling had all the glitters which a woman should have, only those who were extremely close her could look through it but to others she was the ultimate woman, golden goddess. The perfect woman, who knew how to act like a woman, look like a woman and every thing related to a marvellous woman. She had style, grace in appearance and behaviour.

I natually grew up with her, as I was supposed to becaue she is my sibling, seeing her winning the entire limelight, she was every body’s favourite and I was almost invisible. A position which I liked then and love now. When I became teenager I started to observe the traits which made her popular and saw that she had a natural flair for winning hearts.

I was impressed by what she was but never tried copying her. I let her walk her own way and walked my own. In my life I have never looked down upon what god has given me, and have rarely felt jealous for the blessed ones. There is only one thing I really envy when I see in someone, and that is I envy rabindrasangit singers like shantideb ghosh, kanika bandhopadhyay or my mom, whose rabindrasangit I relish, because this is one thing I always yearned to learn but could not . Rabindrasangit is a special type of music written by Tagore and the music was finalised by he, himself.

As I stubbonly refused to copy her , we are so very opposite that her friends used to tease me, that you don’t have any similarity with her. We look completely diffent and our nature, hobbies, lifestyle are completely different. But its also a big truth that I never felt envy for all the limelight she won, most probably because I am saturnian, I believe in the harvest of hard work. I knew she walks out of her scheduled path to get that much attention and affection, and I just was not interested in winning hearts that much. Because from my very childhood I was blessed with a vision of content and to know where to draw the line beyond which I wont go to pursue a desire. I never wanted to be the one in the limelight, I always preferred selected but trusted friends. I don’t know the reason but I never tried to copy her or became jealous of her. This is why I get surprised when I see people trying to copy someone or become destructively jealous.

When we come across these dazzling characters, or are destined to live with them for years, we should always keep our own entity, and in place of being jealous of them or copy them, we should relish their beauty and grow our own beauty. Moon is beautiful but so are the stars. There are people who love moon as much as they love stars, and there are some who love stars more than moon, like me.

We all love roses and butterflies but do we ever try to become one of them? No. do we get jealous of them? No. Then why not act the same way with human beings too?