Sunday, June 7, 2009

a life with golden diva

We all come across them once in a while, or some of us who like me, grow up in shadow of someone like them. The immensely popular persons the golden divas of our famillies. My elder sibling had all the glitters which a woman should have, only those who were extremely close her could look through it but to others she was the ultimate woman, golden goddess. The perfect woman, who knew how to act like a woman, look like a woman and every thing related to a marvellous woman. She had style, grace in appearance and behaviour.

I natually grew up with her, as I was supposed to becaue she is my sibling, seeing her winning the entire limelight, she was every body’s favourite and I was almost invisible. A position which I liked then and love now. When I became teenager I started to observe the traits which made her popular and saw that she had a natural flair for winning hearts.

I was impressed by what she was but never tried copying her. I let her walk her own way and walked my own. In my life I have never looked down upon what god has given me, and have rarely felt jealous for the blessed ones. There is only one thing I really envy when I see in someone, and that is I envy rabindrasangit singers like shantideb ghosh, kanika bandhopadhyay or my mom, whose rabindrasangit I relish, because this is one thing I always yearned to learn but could not . Rabindrasangit is a special type of music written by Tagore and the music was finalised by he, himself.

As I stubbonly refused to copy her , we are so very opposite that her friends used to tease me, that you don’t have any similarity with her. We look completely diffent and our nature, hobbies, lifestyle are completely different. But its also a big truth that I never felt envy for all the limelight she won, most probably because I am saturnian, I believe in the harvest of hard work. I knew she walks out of her scheduled path to get that much attention and affection, and I just was not interested in winning hearts that much. Because from my very childhood I was blessed with a vision of content and to know where to draw the line beyond which I wont go to pursue a desire. I never wanted to be the one in the limelight, I always preferred selected but trusted friends. I don’t know the reason but I never tried to copy her or became jealous of her. This is why I get surprised when I see people trying to copy someone or become destructively jealous.

When we come across these dazzling characters, or are destined to live with them for years, we should always keep our own entity, and in place of being jealous of them or copy them, we should relish their beauty and grow our own beauty. Moon is beautiful but so are the stars. There are people who love moon as much as they love stars, and there are some who love stars more than moon, like me.

We all love roses and butterflies but do we ever try to become one of them? No. do we get jealous of them? No. Then why not act the same way with human beings too?

4 comments:

  1. What a heartfelt and honest entry. Your construction of words is dazzling and I like the phrase "we should grow our own beauty." Jealousy is a fear that stems from insecurity... once you can admit to it and just watch it in awareness... it loses it's appeal.

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  2. Keep up the good work...amazing thoughts and good topics...very good!

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  3. dear lea,
    thanks. honesty is my policy.. i try not to wander away from it..

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