Love is tender, because it always gives priority to the feeling of mate. So it wants his comfort more than own comfort.
Love is made of tender feelings like forgiveness, tenderness, trust, softness. Real love is always willing to forgive, trust. Till the day that trust is shattered to pieces, but that day love also leaves. Or else it rises above any expectations and touches divine. It lets go even the least expectation from the mate. His betrayal, untrustworthiness no longer matter to her. She loves him just the way he is. But such love is not that common.
Love that is not tender and trusting is usually not love, something swinging very close to it but not touching it. It either touches it and becomes complete or dries away with time.
No real lover will treat his mate harshly or unkindly, with anger or venom, mistrust or unkindness. When these symptoms start to crop up in some relationship that means love is slipping away from it.
People often cling to such relationships to cause themselves greater pain in future.